Jumper
by AngstyYaoiFangirl
Summary: Ritsu Onodera is in a state of grief and contemplates if he should live, Will Takano save him before its too late This is a song Fanfic using the Song Jumper by Third Eye Blind. warning rated T for suicide attempt and being a Yaoi


**_Disclaimer- I do not own any of the characters or the song. BTW this song is named Jumper and is by Third Eye Blind_**

* * *

**_I wish you would step back _**  
**_From that ledge my friend_**

It was late in the night at Marukawa Publishing. Nearly every one in the office had gone home, seeing as it was the last day of the cycle, and everyone could finally catch up on some much needed sleep. Only a few people remained in the office, as well as a lone figure standing on the roof of the building. As we panel in on the brunets face we see tear tracks stained on the young males face, and more tears where still rolling from forest green eyes. Ritsu Onodera was trapped in a sea of self loathing.

**_You could cut ties with all the lies _**  
**_That you've been living in _**

Ritsu thought back to his days in high school. Those where the days before he became so jaded. He fell in love with his senpai Masamune Takano. He loved the man in secret for three years. In Masamune's finally year of high school, Ritsu accidentally confessed his feelings. Ritsu thought Masamune loved him too since he said he would go out with Ritsu. But after a night of love making, when Ritsu asked if Masamune loved him...Masamune laughed. In that one moment Ritsu's heart shattered, he then realized (really he misinterpreted this) that Masamune was just fooling with him, that he didn't really love him. Ritsu's heartbroken and jaded, doped out of school and moved after that.

**_And if you do not want to see me again _**  
**_I would understand, I would understand_**

For ten years he forced himself to forget about Masamune, to find someone else, but Ritsu couldn't do that he was too jaded to even try.

**__****_The angry boy a bit too insane_**

After those ten years, by fate, Ritsu and Masamune were brought back together. Of course was angry with Masamune, he blamed him for messing him up. But Masamune said that he only laughed due to embarrassment and that after Ritsu left, he tried to search for him. He then claimed that he would make Ritsu say he loved him again. Ritsu was angry at this, how could he fall back in love with someone who hurt him so bad. That night he punched the wall till his fingers bleed.

**_Icing over a secret pain _**

However Ritsu was overcome with grief, no matter how hard he tried he was still in love with Masamune, and he knew that he would always love him. Of course he would never admit this. It hurt him that he was in love with someone he thought had hurt him.

**__****_You know you don't belong_**

Ritsu thought he tried hard to not admit he was in love, but his actions spoke more and, Ritsu almost admitted it when he saw Takafumi Yokozawa hanging over Masamune. After hearing how his superior felt toward's Masamune,Ritsu thought he couldn't compare to Yokozawa.

**__****_You're the first to fight _**  
**_You're way too loud_**

He tried to fight for Masamune but after hearing how depressed Masamune was those ten years, and how it was Takano who brought him from the darkness, Ritsu gave up. He realized that he was a horrible person. He started to believe that Yokozawa was right. Masamune was better off without him. Today mad him feel worse. Ritsu edged a little closer to the edge of the building.

**_You're the flash of light on a burial shroud_**

Ritsu finally snapped today after Masamune said that his past didn't matter, that he loved the Ritsu now. Ritsu was happy but he knew it was an illusion he knew that after messing up Masamune, he was only saying these things just to crush him with later. So he had shouted at him

"_STOP SAYING THAT! HOW CAN YOU SAY YOU LOVE ME WHEN I'VE BEEN TOLD THAT YOU WENT THROUGH MUCH PAIN BECAUSE OF ME? HOW! YOU'RE JUST TOYING WITH ME. YOUR GOING TO LEAD ME INTO A FALSE SINCE OF SECURITY AND THEN EXACT REVENGE. THAT'S WHAT YOU DID LAST TIME!" Ritsu screamed at Masamune._

**_I know something's wrong _**

Masamune's POV

Today had been a shitty day. First of all the mangaka he was managing had been running real late, even after two extensions. It wasn't till 2 in the morning when they finally got it. I gave it to Kisa to deliver it to the printers. He took of real quick I turned to thank everyone for their hard work and told them they could go home. After saying that my eyes traveled around until they stopped on my ex-lover or should I say soon to be lover again. I watched as he hurriedly gathered his materials and was about to leave.

"Ritsu" I had called out to him.

He paused and looked to me with his forest green eyes._ Damn his eyes were gorgeous!_ I was about to ask if he would accompany me when all of a sudden my friend,Yokozawa butted in and clinged to me. In that moment I witnessed my Ritsu's eye's display sadness, hurt and guilt. And before I could shake off Yokozawa, he had run.

_Shit I have a bad feeling._

**_Well everyone I know has got a reason _**  
**_To say put the past away _**

I finally managed to shake off Yokozawa and ran after Ritsu. Catching up to him, I grabbed one of his arms and pulled him into an empty conference room. As soon as the door closed I immediately attacked pressing my feverish lips to his in a desperate kiss. He struggled against me, but I held my ground for a good bit before he finally managed to shove me back. I saw confusion guilt and sadness painted on his face. I did not want to s those expressions so I said, "I Love You, Ritsu"  
**_I wish you would step back  
_****_From that ledge my friend _**

I expected him to yell at me, what I did not expect was the words that he yelled out.

"_STOP SAYING THAT! HOW CAN YOU SAY YOU LOVE ME WHEN I'VE BEEN TOLD THAT YOU WENT THROUGH MUCH PAIN BECAUSE OF ME? HOW! YOU'RE JUST TOYING WITH ME. YOUR GOING TO LEAD ME INTO A FALSE SINCE OF SECURITY AND THEN EXACT REVENGE. THAT'S WHAT YOU DID LAST TIME!" _

**_You could cut ties with all the lies _**  
**_That you've been living in _**

I was surprised at his words and finally figured out why Ritsu's face showed guilt. He realized that he had made a mistake in his past and figured out that because of it, I went through pain. Now he feared that I didn't love him and that I was only pretending to love him. I realized that Ritsu could not forgive himself and because he couldn't, to hi no one could. I wished he would forget about the past.

**_And if you do not want to see me again _**  
**_I would understand, I would understand _**

While I thought on this I didn't realize that Ritsu had run to the door, he glimpsed back toward me one more time before running out. That one glance of his face told me he didn't want to see me. I could understand that now, and maybe I would have left him alone after he ran out, had his glance not shown me the expression on his face.  
**_Well he's on the table and he's gone to code_**

An expression I had never seen before. His face had been twisted into utter despair and defeat. His eyes held expressed the pain he kept locked for ten years.

**_And I do not think anyone knows _**  
**_What they're doing here _**

His expression left me cold and an ominous feeling washed over me.

**_And your friends have left you  
_****_You've been dismissed_**

I thought you would run to one of your friends for consoling, as I watched you run toward the door. But then I watched as you suddenly veered right towards the stair case. Wondering what you where planning I followed as quick as I could. You kept running up the stairs and I wondered where the hell was he going. Finally he I watched my Ritsu open a door and ran out. I walked to see the sign on the door and read it. "_Roof Top"_ I sighed and walked out the door, planning to talk to him and make him understand, but as soon as I spotted where he was I froze.

**_I never thought it would come to this _**

He was standing at the edge of the roof, way to close to be sight seeing and I thought  
"_Lord No! Don't tell me that he's planning to jump!"_

I felt fear grip me as I slowly walked towards him. I saw that Ritsu started to edge even closer to the edge.

"RITSU NO! DON'T DO IT! PLEASE, DON'T!"

Ritsu turned his head to me and I could see all the tears he had locked away rolling down his face. And then just as slowly he turned his head back. looking out toward the city. Suddenly I could hear Ritsu speak, he was whispering low so I had to strain my ears to hear what he was saying.  
"_Why is it you? Why do I have to be in love with you? I thought that you had been toying with me those ten years ago. But then to find out that it was me who had mistook it...and then finding out that my misunderstanding hurt you...I never wanted to hurt you...But I hurt you pretty bad...I can't forgive myself for the pain I've inflicted on you...if I can't how can I expect that you could...It's so very painful...I just want this pain to end..."_

**And_ I, I want you to know _**  
**_Everyone's got to face down the demons _**

After hearing this I edged a little closer and started to tell him

"_Ritsu, it was not your fault...it was mine...even though I was nervous I never should have laughed...in fact you were right somewhat...all those years ago when we first started dating, I was just playing with you...but then I found that you where a really good person and eventually I found myself really in love with you. After you left I did fall into a dark depression but you had a very small part in that, I had a lot of family problems going on, but remembering you and hoping to see you again, helped get me through my day. And when I found you again, All I could think of was that it was fate. _  
**Maybe_ today _**  
**_You could put the past away _**

_And I want you to know Ritsu, that I am no longer in love with you from the past...no I have fallen in love with the present you. _  
**_I wish you would step back from _**  
**_That ledge my friend _**

So please don't leave me again

**_You could cut ties with all the lies _**  
**_That you've been living in _**

Forget about the past like I have and fall in love with the present me just like I have done.  
**_And if you do not want to see me again _**

And if you can't fall for me again, then I will leave just don't throw your life away.  
**_I would understand, I would understand _**  
**_I would understand, I would understand _**  
**_I would understand, I would understand _**

Don't end your life because of me. Live and if you can't do that then I promise that if you fall from here..then I will follow you...I will fall with you."

When I told Ritsu that if he fell from here I would follow, I saw a look of fear and he quickly turned yelling

"NO!"

He didn't move from the edge as he said this.

**_Can you put the past away_**

I slowly walked toward him so as not to startled him into falling and whispered, "Then put the past away and come with me. I love you to much and if I lose you again I really would not be able to live. I will follow you. So please step away from there and love me and let me love you." I stretched out my hand to him.

i watched as he started to reach out to take it, he took a step forward and that one step gave me a heart attack, as I watched him slip and fell from the roof.

Adrenaline pumping through me, like lightning I grabbed his already stretched out hand and pulled him with all my might back up. Fear shaking in both of us as to what almost happened.

As my Ritsu started to cry I hugged him close to me, whispering apologies and words of comfort into his ear. He hugged me back tightly, holding on for dear life.

We held each other there for a long time until Ritsu finally fell asleep, his head resting on my chest.

Ever so gently I gathered him in my arms and started to walk back toward the building and then onward to our apartment.

Upon reaching my room I placed Ritsu on my bed before getting in with him. I placed my arms around him protectively and was about to fall asleep when I heard The editor in my arms whisper, "_I love you,Masamune."_  
I turned toward the the voice and meet forest green eyes staring at me, I smiled and whispered back, "I love you to, Ritsu"

With that we both fell asleep in each other's arms, peace finally enveloping us.

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AngstyYaoiFangirl- So yeah this is my first song fanfic and I would like to ask how y'all thought of it so please review and give me any constructional criticism i would like but no flames. Oh and I would like to apologize for not posting this sooner but I didn't have internet over the weekend. I also want to apologize if the second half of the fanfic is crap cause I'm sick at the moment...hehe my fever rose to a 100.3 and here I am writing. So Ritsu and Masamune what do y'all think?

Ritsu- I like it. At least it's not like how you wrote for Junjou Romantica

Masamune- It's okay I guess but I have to agree with Ritsu and thank you for not making it like how you wrote abut Usagi and Misaki.

Usagi- I just finished reading this fanfic and now I'm pissed at you...they get a happy ending and Me ad Misaki don't?!

Misaki- Usagi even though in that one fanfic we died it was a happy ending.

AngstyYaoiFangirl- Misaki's write besides you guys got lemons while these guy's didn't

Usagi- That is true... I guess I can't stay mad at you.

AngstyYaoiFangirl- No you can't, But I think I will make a Fanfic where Ritsu gets Sick...I only saw that there are like only 5 fanfics where he gets sick and that kind of annoys me. Oh and I just finished watching the Anime Loveless and *Squeal* that was so good but I'm going to read the manga because the anime ending I was not satisfied with. so when I finish that I probably will make a fanfic for that as well. Wich reminds me I will be making a sequel to the Original Fragile Heart story. Remember that Fragile hear's revered ending was not a squeal it was just an alternative ending.I have three names for it it depending on how I right it, It will either be called Broken Dream's, Fate's Dream, or Love's Choice ...Anyway Review this fanfic one please.


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